Thursday, November 1, 2007

the worst news

Went to the OB for the 4 month visit. Hoping we might get a sneak peek at the confirmation that we were having a boy on the ultrasound.

Doc couldn't see well, fibroid in the way. Sends me downstairs to the hospital. Hubby meets me there for the better visual.

40 minutes later with 2 radiology techs we learn that there is no heartbeat. None. And a recent occurrence, as the baby measured 16 weeks.


Go home in shock.

Have to wait 9 days for D&E because stupid Catholic hospital had to refer me to a specialist. Then do I learn that they can't take out the fibroid for another 8 weeks or so, and then maybe weeks after that, I can try to get pregnant again.

Had surgery 1 last Thursday.

Trying to stay positive. At least we know the reason the baby didn't make it and it can be remedied before I get pregnant again.

Feel lost. Started going to church. Feel sad for hubby--he was so excited. He doesn't talk about it much but can tell he is just lost. We were so excited. Had to pack up the maternity clothes (which I was already wearing because the fibroid was so big I was sizing for 6mos). Pack up all the great deals we got on baby gear at garage sales.

Keep us in your prayers.