Friday, April 1, 2011

Third time's the charm.

We found out today we're having a boy.

I walked in the door tonight and Dani came running to me saying, "Hi mommy and Tommy!" I'm happy for us, for Big Man.

How we ended up having a third should probably be noted. When I was pregnant with Tori, about 7 months along or so, Big Man said to me, "Don't you think we'd look back and regret it if we didn't have a third?". I'm pretty sure I told him I didn't want the one I was carrying. (Sorry Tori; I was a grumpy pregnant lady.) I am sure I told him hellz no, I didn't ever want a third. And I didn't. (Sorry Tommy.) I'm still on the fence. (I'm sure I'll love you eventually, Tommy.) But when I started to think about what Big Man said to me that night, the words he used....regret. It really sunk in. Surely, I'd never look back and regret that I had another baby (well, unless they were in a Girls Gone Wild video or something). But I already knew that Big Man would look back and regret that we hadn't had a third. And I never wanted him to look back at anything in our life and be able to say he regretted it. Because I knew that there isn't a single thing I will ever regret about my life with him.

So I asked the doctor and he said wait 6 months after Tori. At about month 3, I told Big Man that we could start trying, since I figured it would take a few months. Big Man said we were done, because I didn't want more babies. I insisted we weren't because he did. He said no. I said yes. I cried. I won. We bought the book How to Make a Girl or Boy Baby and Big Man followed the rules, tracked my cycle meticulously, and made a boy.

And so, friends, our family will be complete. Tommy, I love the concept of you, and Big Man, I love you as completely as I can imagine loving anything in the universe.

Tommy, you are being named after the two men I love most in this world, your daddy and mine. I hope you have your father's gentleness. His quiet strength. His temper--your daddy never reacts, he reasons; I have never heard him speak a word or act in anger. I hope we show you by example what a loving marriage and happy family is so that you may create your own someday.

Tommy, I hope you have your grandpa's ease. You're going to love him. Your grandpa is comfortable in any social situation, which is a rare thing. He can blend into a room of dignitaries and know which fork to use as easily as he can (smoothly) palm a twenty into the restaurant host's hand so we get a quicker table, as easily as he can fix the brakes on your car. I wouldn't be who I am without him, and neither will you.

Finally, and most importantly Tommy, I hope you have your older sisters' ability to sleep through the night. Please be a good sleeper. If you are the competitive type, you should know that both your sisters were sleeping almost all night by about 3 months. You should try to beat them, you know, show them whose boss. Make 8 weeks your goal, Tommy, and you and I will get along just fine.

So, son, you probably won't have a baby book, or nearly as many pictures of your childhood as Dani has, but know now that it's not because we love you any less. We're just tired--your sisters keep us pretty busy. As will you. Welcome.

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