The potty training blues.

This brilliant little 3 1/2 year old is killing me with the potty training.  We dropped the hammer and instituted an underwear only rule (except for bedtime and the occasional nap) a few days ago.  She refuses to poop on the potty.  Refuses.  Sits for long periods of time on the potty asking for lollipops and to play games on my phone and promises to poop if she has them.  (I give her the phone--but no food, no eating while pooping, thankyouverymuch).  She just plays games on the phone and never poops.

Now that she's in underwear, she holds it (the poops) in all day, despite the fact that Big Man puts her on the potty once every hour or so.  Like every night, she says she needs to poop and asks for a diaper, so we put her on the potty.  Tears flow.  She has won the battle every night so far, as we know she will just poop in the nightime diaper as soon as we put her to bed...so I cave close to bedtime and put her in a diaper.

Last night, on the potty, Dani said, "Mommy, I'm thinking of a thing that is like underwear, but has velcro tabs and you could just put me on the changing table and put it on me, ok?"
And then she gives me the angelic face.

I used to joke and say (about my kid) that once your kid is old enough to request a specific diapering protocol ("I need powder" or "I need the baby rash cream with the baby on it") they are WAY too old to be in diapers.
But dang it--I'm at a loss here. 

She knows what she needs to do.  She just won't do it.  I've talked to her about pre-school and needing to poop on the potty, etc., but to no avail.  I know once she does it once it will be easy-peasy.  But getting her there......hellish!  Meanwhile, Tori pees on command (multiple times a day, even waking from a nap with a dry diaper), so I'm hoping it will be easier with kiddo number 2!