Excuse me while I throw my laptop out the window.

I've spent the last hour trying to edit and save a photo to post to the blog tonight. Fermi, a reader of the blog, whom I've never met, suggested that a photo of actual consumption of a Chicago Polish would be a good idea.

Big man cooked them up. I donned a cubs hat, grabbed an Old Style (did not open) and asked him to take a photo of me firing one down.

Just prior to my photo shoot, I had just gotten home from an outdoor event, hot and sweaty, so I showered, and am clean and (atypically) makeup free, so it wasn't a good photo to begin with. But, I'm game. Kodak easyshare kept crashing as I asked it to save the photo. Had to crop and get rid of the insane red eye, but it wouldn't work--and I tried three times.

Now, I am determined. I am going to find a way to post this hideous photo of me, because I want to post the "Baby's First Polish" photo tonight. So, I fire up the free photo software that came with the $4.99 ebay camera. Well, THAT software will let me crop the photo, but won't let me use the red eye removal program without paying for an upgrade. F-that. I'm not paying for jack.

So, filled with rage, I am on to Plan C. Go to Microsoft Paint and spray paint in some black color over the raging red of my pupils. But screw it, I'm posting the scary, unnaturally black pupil, spray edited photo, because damnit, I'm a stubborn pregnant lady who should be in bed already but was determined to post this, regardless of how bad (ok, let's say fresh-faced and youthful) I look.

So, here you have it, Baby's First Polish: