Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Things that p*ss me off.

Martha Stewart Living Magazine. I don't know why I subscribe. Well, actually, I do. It was cheap. My theory on magazines, which I read with every free non-internet non-baby moment I have, is that if a year's subscription is under $20, I'll buy it, because that's like $1.75 per month, and even if I get ten minutes out of the magazine, it was worth it. I get about 20 magazines. Hmmm. Let's see if I can name them:
1. Newsweek
2. Real Simple
3. Esquire
4. Martha Stewart Living
5. Parenting
6. Parents
7. Parenting the early years
8. American Baby
9. Working Mother (worst. magazine. ever.)
10. Redbook (once I hit 35 I made the transition from Glamour)
11. Better Homes and Gardens
12. Good Housekeeping
13. Family Circle
14. Star (my guilty pleasure)
15. Various law journals
16. State Legislatures
17. Real Food (I think that's what it is called but it should be called recipes a 9 year old could think up and cook.)
18. & 19. The University of Chicago, Albany Law School, and AOII (shakedown) Magazines, free for life in hopes that you will donate.

There may be some others, but that's all I can think of as I sit here, and I don't really feel like getting up.

But, anyway, Martha Stewart Living. If there were ever a magazine that could make a woman feel wholly inadequate (like a girly magazine but in the opposite, or domestic way) it is this magazine. I don't know a single woman who has the time to do 99% of the things in the magazine. Sure, I appreciate a good recipe as much as the next mom, but using rubber fish forms and paint and rice paper to make art? Alone? Because you have that much time? Who are you? I want to marry you and eat the tasty Martha Stewart recipes and live in the nicely decorated as suggested by Martha home. Please?
Well, reader (Dad) you've been patient and let me yammer, and so now, the reason you are actually here:

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